Foster-Baby-Elephant-Walrus-Russ

A baby elephant was admitted into the Sparky Fund and I was trying to get clearance to foster it. BECAUSE HOW AMAZING WOULD THAT BE? AN ELEPHANT? LIVING IN MY HOUSE? I could come up with so many puns for this.

I wanted him to have a really cool name so I could post a picture of me and him on Reddit and get a shit ton of karma, but some idiot in the Sparky Fund named him "Walrus" when I wasn't there.

This was horrifying to me and I spent a long time contemplating a solution before happening upon the incredible revelation that I can just refer to him as "Russ."

I spent the rest of the dream bargaining with my mother to try and get her to let me bring Russ home. I came up with several crazy ideas including a scenario in which I lived in the bathroom and slept in the bathtub and Russ got my whole room to himself.

A compromise was not reached before I woke up, but I did spend a good two minutes upon waking up still under the delusion that I was going to be bringing home an elephant.

This is Chang Yim, a baby elephant living in the Elephant Nature Park mentioned below.
I might nickname him Russ.

This was actually strangely coincidental. About a month later I got an email telling me that I was accepted into the Elephant Nature Park volunteer program for this summer, overseas in Thailand. Only two weeks, but  it's all I could afford through ISV. I'm excited on this strange level where I don't want to express it because I'm still not sure it's real, like I'm not really going to believe it's happening until I'm literally standing there touching an elephant. Like a weird sort of shock. This could be my future. This could be my foot-in-the-door of travelling, researching, and animal conservation. Or it could be two awesome weeks with elephants and that's it. I'm cool with either scenario. Here's the park in question, if anyone's interested in donating or just checking them out. You can read about all of the members of the herd and their stories - it's basically a giant elephant version of the Sparky Fund. Which you can also read about on the link below the elephant one. Both are great causes for amazing animals.

Elephant Nature Park in Chiang Mai, Thailand

The Sparky Fund

The Saddest Dream Ever

I had a dream that Adam Devine (of Workaholics) died.

It turned out to just be a rumor.

Which I found out while frolicking around on a dock with him and Blake, and Ders.

Which was really fun.

I'm glad he isn't dead.

Guy with face burned off

I'm playing a character

Character has adult gay dude friend

Gay dude friend gets in car accident, stumbles out of car, his pants are on fire but no one notices.

My character sees the fire and chooses to ignore it.

Another civilian is on fire, me and another guy immediately react to it with emergency procedures, thus proving that I was totally capable and willing to save a burning person but had consciously chosen not to with my gay friend.

After being left burning long enough, the fire spread very suddenly and completely engulfed my gay friend. He began screaming, people ran over from all directions, but he was burning and they couldn't stop it. I watched his skin burn off and he crumpled to the ground, his skeleton showing through his charred body. People were unsure what to do to help him, they had no fire blanket or water or extinguisher. Someone tried to support his head as he collapsed, engulfed in flames, but as soon as they touched his charred neck, his head fell off and thudded onto the ground. It was horribly disturbing.

Later on, I resumed my role and was suddenly swept upon by a cloaked villain, who was out for vengeance upon me.

The twist was pretty obvious, the cloaked villain eventually revealed a flash of his face, which was a strange, orange and red mask that was obviously covering some sort of deformity. I realized it was my gay friend I had allowed to burn to a crisp and die right in front of me. I kind of laughed sheepishly at the realization that my character was kind of screwed and also a jackass. Then me and everyone else around me got in order based on height.